Atomic Bombshell

Archive for November, 2004

Bleeding Ears

No doubt somebody will tell me I’m a racist for bringing this up, but phuket… Wait, that’s Thai… But what the heck, it’s FUN to stir the pot so here goes:

So I’m at the nail salon the other day. The same one that I’ve been going to since I was sixteen. Twice a month I head there for my regular appointment. It’s supposed to be a relaxing experience in a spa-like atmosphere. A little pampering, a little relaxation… Right?

Not exactly. Let me tell you what it’s really like…

I walk in to this adorable little hole-in-the-wall, where there is music softly playing, surrounded by peaceful peach-colored walls, assorted flower arrangements, and the bubbling of pedicure baths.

Greeted sweetly by small-framed ladies with delicate features and perfectly straight black hair, they speak softly and demurely with broken English through gentle smiles. While seated, I begin to unwind and forget all the hustle and bustle of my busy life until…

I am suddenly shocked back to reality by the most horrifying sounds ever to assault my ears.

These women start to speak (and I use the term loosely) to eachother in their native tongue, using the most awful ear-piercing tones I have ever heard in my life! And amidst this horror, for just a split second I think to myself, “So this is why we bombed Vietnam.”

I’m a very bad person… I know.

19 comments November 23rd, 2004

The Little Chill

We’re having a little cold snap here in California. Wintery weather is a rare treat in Los Angeles, and I absolutely love it! Wanna know why?…

1. Hot chocolate with marshmallows
2. Wearing scarves that I made
3. Actually using the fireplace
4. Fur trim on everything
5. High-heeled boots
6. More cuddling
7. Goofy hats

6 comments November 21st, 2004

Athletes Neck?

I am warning you in advance: If you don’t like to hear about people’s disgusting personal aliments – Move along, nothing to see here.

However, if you’re an information junkie like me, and you actually enjoy thumbing through gory medical journals – Read on…

Welcome to the Freakshow

Three weeks ago, I noticed this reddish patch right near my collarbone, at the base of my neck. It looked like a burn or a hickey something, but it didn’t hurt… it was just there.

Apart from exposing my vanity it didn’t do much, so I didn’t stress until a week had passed with no imrovement. By then I had worn every turtleneck sweater at least once and tried every over-the-counter treatment I could think of.

So I saw my doctor last Wednesday, and he says that he thinks it’s ringworm. Ringworm? That sounds particularly disgusting. Don’t only dirty people get things like that? Gross! He tells me to continue with the antifungal cream and asked me what I was doing the day it appeared.

After thinking back a bit, I realize… Wasn’t that the day that I bought ten pounds of mushrooms and rolled around in them? No. Hmm… All I did that day was finish a lot of crochet projects while watching season two Alias DVDs… Oh, and I worked out at the gym.

Damn that gym! I’m sure they’re behind this.

It’s been nearly three weeks since this ghastly lesion showed up, and despite following my doctor’s instruction faithfully, there has been no improvement. So now it’s gone from being an oddity to a big mystery. All I know is, I want it to leave without a trace.

16 comments November 18th, 2004

M-I-See Ya

Greetings from Disneyland

5 comments November 17th, 2004

E is for Extortion

I wonder how much Jon B would be willing to pay me not to post pictures of the two of us together blissfully dancing, cheek to cheek.

Yeah, I know what you’re thinking… “Aurora, why in the world would a hot R&B star like Jon B be bothered by pictures of him dancing with a sexy girl like you?”

To which I say…

Because I don’t think that dancing the tarantella with me in ballet class while wearing TIGHTS is going to be very good for his image.

B is for Ballerina.

12 comments November 16th, 2004

Next Posts Previous Posts

About Me




Time Travel