July 23rd, 2005
I declare jihad on the hairstyle known as the “Fauxhawk” – Not to be confused with its badass cousin, the Mohawk… The faux is a pathetic attempt to be edgy while still holding down an office job.
The first time I saw one I thought it was interesting… For five minutes. But now I’m seeing them everywhere, on a wide range of men from age 15 to 50 – The fauxhawk has become the 21st century mullet!
Death to the fauxhawk. Either go all the way by shaving the sides and dying the remainder blue, or just accept the fact that your life doesn’t have room for interesting hair and move on. Thanks for listening.
Entry Filed under: Carrie's Rants
27 Comments
1.
Aurora | July 23rd, 2005 at 9:45 pm
Here’s a photo of the original Fauxhawk, invented in 1909.
Why would a grown man want to look like a Kewpie doll?
2.
MissMeliss | July 23rd, 2005 at 10:06 pm
Thank you for posting this. Those hairstyles have reminded me of *something* and until you posted the kewpie doll pic I didn’t know what.
Why indeed?
3.
Lewis Moten | July 23rd, 2005 at 11:52 pm
Wait … people have been doing that on purpose? I just thought that was the classic bed-head.
4.
~Easy | July 24th, 2005 at 5:41 am
I always thought it was bed-head too. However, now that I know it’s stylish I won’t need to put on a baseball cap to run down to Starbucks.
5.
Salena | July 24th, 2005 at 6:10 am
I’m with ya on that one. It was “interesting” for a minute, now- not so much. If they must attempt to be stylish, can’t they just go for the completely tousled look or something? heh
6.
Neil | July 24th, 2005 at 4:04 pm
For somehow who hardly combs his hair, how do they get it like that — is it hair gel?
7.
Poppy | July 24th, 2005 at 8:16 pm
I thought they were trying to be as cool as Tintin, the Belgian boy detective. But the Kewpie thing makes more sense.
So what’s next–hair like the Campbell’s Kids?
8.
Kristine | July 25th, 2005 at 11:15 am
My friend’s b/f wears one frequently. He uses some kind of hair wax. I kinda like ‘em still. Bedhead, tousled, mini-mohawk… Yum!
9.
MJJ | July 26th, 2005 at 2:56 am
Faux sucks for sure.
10.
Lunchtruck | July 26th, 2005 at 9:42 am
Personally, I consider it my sole purpose in life to bring around the next hair trend… The Christopher Lloyd mad scientist wingback lunatic fringe bedhead look! Those fauxhawks will never know what hit them… I’ll show you messy hair!
11.
Viki | July 26th, 2005 at 12:03 pm
LOL! My 8 yr old son has a REAL mohawk, dyed various colors for special occasions, one having been Lollapalooza this past weekend. We saw many fauxhawks. One guy with a particularly annoying fauxhawk said to my son, “Hey, nice hair!” My cool-as-hell son gave him the whaddup nod, and after we had passed out of earshot, he said, “That guy’s mohawk was so FAKE!” You can see pics of my son and his glorious, real mohawk on my blog if you care to.
12.
Neb | July 27th, 2005 at 9:27 pm
People are actually trying to look like that? Kewpie is right. They all look like Ed Grimley.
13.
Katie | July 28th, 2005 at 4:21 pm
I thought they were called fins.
14.
Natasha | September 26th, 2005 at 9:19 pm
Umm no! I need a job I am in highschool and I dyed my hair purple a couple of weeks ago and had to wear a HAT… I look horrible in this hat by the way. I would love to go all out and shave the sides and dye it purple… But I can’t… So a crazy short sides long top with edgy “natural” colours strategically placed by my stylist will have to do. Sorry if I offend you while walking down the street!
15.
Lexram | February 12th, 2006 at 12:18 am
Umm personally i have very nappy and bumpy head, so i decided to go hardcore and shave the sides of my head that would infacte be more disgusting. And besides i am a firm believer in dressing how i feel. Some days i feel like styling a fauxhawk ( i usually call it a fro hawk) and other days i don’t. So you all can get over it k.
Why all of you indeed ask why, I ask Why not.
16.
A kid | March 16th, 2006 at 5:25 pm
Im thinking about getting a fauxhawk type hairstyle…
but i don’t want to look like a dyke. Erm..
So i wanted to keep it kind of long, but short enough so i could
get a flip thing going. Yerrr, anyone know any good sites for pictures of non lesbianic pictures of girls with fauxhawks?
17.
Kate | March 29th, 2006 at 3:59 pm
Well i think its kinda pathetic to be even talking about how pathetic hairstyles are? Like c’mon dont you have anything better to do? You make such a big deal for people who spike there hair up well WHO CARES? obvouisly you do which its pretty darn sad people
18.
Tory | May 22nd, 2006 at 12:23 pm
I’m a girl who has never had much toleration for hair, so when my friend suggested I get a fauxhawk, I jumped for it. I’m planning on it being more of a Keira Knightley messy/spikey hair thing. I would like some pics of girls with fauxhawks, so if anyone finds some…? Hit me up with an email or something.
19.
Sah | June 11th, 2006 at 5:27 pm
Yea, I’m African American and Hispanic and a fauxhawk is really great for my type of hair when its straightened. I could never pull a mohawk off, but my hawk isnt a gay ass Ryan Seacrest version. I have mad props for anyone who wears a mohawk, and I wish I could.
20.
Rendi | June 15th, 2006 at 4:28 am
I want my hair like Fauxhawk, but I can’t do it coz I don’t have any picture of fauxhawk to show to my hairstylist. Can you help me? If there is any photo of fauxhawk send to my email at spidey_2209@yahoo.com
21.
Johnny | July 24th, 2006 at 2:56 pm
Dude, haha, I used to wear my hair faux style, and this summer I was like, fuck it, so I did my mohawk myself, and this shit turned out major sick. I thought it was going to be difficult, but not at all… Everyone totally digs it.
22.
John Matchie | August 21st, 2006 at 3:07 pm
I would like some pics of fauxhawks. I currently wear my hear spikey and I would like to get a fauxhawk.
23.
SCOTT | September 15th, 2006 at 9:11 pm
ALL OF YOU WHO DONT LIKE THE HAWK CAN SUCK MY BALLS!!
24.
Kevin | March 31st, 2007 at 2:52 pm
Long live the faux!!
25.
Marlon | April 2nd, 2007 at 2:57 pm
Why all this hate on the faux? The ladies love a guy that can be both edgy and presentable. All you faux haters out there need to chill the f*&* out. Fernando torres rocks it fresh.
26.
Daniel | April 5th, 2007 at 7:45 pm
I’ve got a faux hawk and I have to admit, there are some bad ones out there with the full clips and bulges of hair on the sides. I believe it should be trimmed. What I hear a lot that people wearing a faux hawk are mohawk wanna bes …for most that’s not the case at all.
27.
Cliff | April 7th, 2007 at 3:00 pm
Seriously, the only people that I know that get upset over a hair style are homosexuals. Just wanted you to know that. Keep up the good fight.