Atomic Bombshell


October 27th, 2005

SATC GirlsMaybe there are only two kinds of girls: Those with girlfriends, and those with guyfriends. For the past fifteen years or so, with the exception of a two year stint in sorority, I have been of the second ilk. Haven’t had a close female friend since 1989. Sometimes I wonder if that’s the result of some deep-seated issues with women, or if I’m just better suited to males.

Lately, I’ve been yearning for a same-gender friendship, fearing that I may be missing out on something truly wonderful. Or maybe I’ve skillfully avoided a heaping pile of bullshit. After all, when a guy says he likes your shoes he means it, but when a girl does, usually it means she wishes she could rip them from your cold, dead body. I’m exaggerating, but you know what I mean… Jealousy is a killer, and I run from it.

Anyway, I really wouldn’t even know where to begin to find a girlfriend. Isn’t that pathetic? It’s not like I’m going to join some club just to make friends. (Again? Go Sigma Kappa!) As much as I might fantasize about chance encounters… “Hey, I saw that top first. Well, it does go better with your eyes. Okay, you keep it. You’ve got great style. Let’s be friends forever!” …The last time those simple tactics worked, I was nine years old, building sandcastles at the beach.

Entry Filed under: Atomic Bombshell,One Of The Guys


  • 1. Char  |  October 27th, 2005 at 10:22 pm

    I’m better suited for males, I have no time for female drama.

  • 2. 'Chele  |  October 27th, 2005 at 10:53 pm

    I am so laughing at this post and may follow up… I work in a mans world and I can’t tell you how much I feel like it is a drug… I want to grunt and scratch my nuts sometimes… hahahahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

    Oh shit, I choked and shed a tear from laughing so hard…

  • 3. Lewis Moten  |  October 27th, 2005 at 11:29 pm

    Perhaps you can try out a virtual girlfriend. If that doesn’t help, look to the left and right in spinning class. I hear talking helps take some calories off too. 😆

  • 4. Trey  |  October 28th, 2005 at 12:07 am

    Maybe you need to find a girl friend who has similar views as you and also has mostly guy friends.

  • 5. Lisa  |  October 28th, 2005 at 12:53 am

    Well, if you ever move to Seattle… I think we would make great gal-pals. We could even arm-wrestle!

  • 6. Andrew QH  |  October 28th, 2005 at 1:04 am

    I pray you find some quality women.
    They exist, I promise.

  • 7. Kangamini  |  October 28th, 2005 at 1:25 am

    I’m feeling the same way but only about straight people. Only friends I have (especially here in PHX) are gay… Sometimes I forget there is a world out there where the conversation isnt always about Nick & Jessica or who’s a top or bottom!

  • 8. soapbox.SUPERSTAR  |  October 28th, 2005 at 6:38 am

    I am really easy going and get along well with both sexes. I have really good guy friends and girl friends. My best friend Nadine has been with me since 6th grade. My other best girlfriend, Dena, I met at work about 5 years ago.

    I have also made some really good girlfriends through blogging, where we start emailing and getting to know each other on a more personal level, one I actually talk to on the phone quite regularly!

    Guy friends are great, but who do you talk shit about the guys with? That’s what the girlfriends are good for – the venting!!! :mrgreen:

  • 9. Salena  |  October 28th, 2005 at 6:39 am

    I’ve also had mostly male friends too. Most girlfriends I’ve had usually end up annoying the hell out of me because of the whole jealousy thing or stabbing me in the back. I was lucky enough to meet a new friend at work though. She is fabulous.

    If you find a way to meet new girlfriends without joining a club or something, let us know. 😕

  • 10. Master Foley  |  October 28th, 2005 at 7:38 am

    Umm… Well, I can’t help ya out there. Someone mentioned the spinning class, that might be a good start.

  • 11. The Bombshell  |  October 28th, 2005 at 8:12 am

    Maybe part of the problem is that my male friends are some of the most awesome people on earth. I don’t mean to sound ungrateful… I love those guys so much!

  • 12. Neil  |  October 28th, 2005 at 9:39 am

    I think it’s important to have friends of the same sex. I’m sure there are things you can talk about more easily with them than a guy. But then again, I don’t have that much trouble talking to women friends about everything — So maybe not.

  • 13. The Bombshell  |  October 28th, 2005 at 11:06 am

    There’s nothing lacking in conversation, it’s more like companionship.
    Someone I can take shopping, without the kicking and screaming.
    Even my gay friends are too “He-Man” for a day on Robertson!

  • 14. Deb  |  October 28th, 2005 at 11:23 am

    For years, I had mostly guy friends too. It wasn’t until I had a baby and *gasp* joined a playgroup that I made some female friends. I think it’s good to have girlfriends, even just one or two, who you can share things and do things with. Shopping, I prefer to do alone, but that’s just me. I have also met some good friends online, so you never know when you’ll meet someone you hit it off with, even if you don’t see them in person all the time. Next time I’m down your way, maybe we can meet! 🙂

  • 15. Malia  |  October 28th, 2005 at 1:00 pm

    I was gonna suggest lesbians. However FACT: We all sleep with our friends at one time of another… Yeah, I miss my straight guy friends.

  • 16. Master Foley  |  October 28th, 2005 at 2:23 pm

    You know, I don’t mind shopping with a woman. I just ask for a little modeling… Give us a little show… Ya know

  • 17. Neb  |  October 28th, 2005 at 7:05 pm

    I’m just sorry you live so far away. I think we are a lot alike. As my male friends say, “You’re not a girl, you’re Neb!” The girlie stuff really, really gets on my nerves. When I have a few extra bucks I buy a book or a DVD or something for the garden. I know women who spend money they DON’T have on manicures and hair dos and new pumps ad nauseum.

    I don’t mind wearing the same dress twice, as long as it’s a knockout. I also like to go hiking and shooting and who cares if my pants are baggy.

    My worst “girlie girl” experience was on a job in Alaska a couple of years ago. I was cook for an archaeological field school. The students were all undergrads, but I still expected a lot more common sense from these people, especially since the syllabus contained several pages on how to outfit yourself and why. It was to no avail. The girls, with the exception of one in her 50s, all brought low-rise jeans, cropped tops, and thong undies for digging in the dirt. One even brought a leopard print bikini, which would have been nifty at Waikiki…but on the 40Mile River deep in the AK wilderness?! They all had mosquito welts around their middles and complained of the cold (they all wore cotton constantly…no fleece, wool, polypro…it was really unbelievable). Let’s just say they did not improve my opinion of the average girl.

  • 18. Boudica of Suburbia  |  October 28th, 2005 at 9:36 pm

    I get on with most people but, yeah… I need my sistas… Holla! God, I’m sooo lame!

  • 19. April  |  October 29th, 2005 at 7:34 pm

    Sorry about the late response. 🙂 Basically, I feel you on that one. Right now though, it’s been a lot easier for me to talk to other women in school, because the women who are at the graduate school of social work want to help people who are disenfranchised, and I agree with that. Most women could care less… many women are caught in the belief that the only important things in life are getting married and producing children…. the bottom line, however, is that a true good friend is hard to find no matter what gender one is.

  • 20. Nanette  |  October 30th, 2005 at 10:43 pm

    Aww, I’ll be your friend. You can basically find me in any Santa Monica-area Coffee Bean. 😀

  • 21. DianaCrabtree  |  October 31st, 2005 at 4:25 pm

    I think girlfriends are totally worth it, high maintenence, but thats the point, you give more and you get more. But yeah, how do you make them? Hard.

    Girls seem to love me, (especially the girlfriends of the guys I like- UH!) I think the reason they like me is I am a recovering man-hater so when I am around women I never see them as competition, I see them as part of an elite club, the elite club of not-a-man 😉

    Next time you are talking to a girl who seems cool just think about everything that is cool about her and how you are so cool that you are the one to decide this. Boom! A camraderie tone is set. By the end of the conversation you will be exchanging those little best friend heart necklaces! (Ok, maybe not.)

  • 22. La Bella  |  November 1st, 2005 at 12:40 pm

    I only have a “few” best-girl friends.
    Being in the military I’ve come across a lot of backstabbin’ biotches. you know what I mean? It’s all about “RANK”. I hate that shit. [excuse my language] My feeling is, my Hubby earned his rank so why act like “I earned it” and am wearing it ya know?
    Too political. I swear if you met me, you’d have no idea I was a military wife. I don’t know crap about the military and I’ve been a military wife 7 years now.

    I will go out of my way to NOT meet any military wives because they come with too much drama. Girls come with too much drama. Even in H.S, I had more guy friends than girl friends. Jealousy comes a lot with girls. And I can’t stand it either. That’s why it’s so hard for me to have friends.

    LOL Sorry… long ass post.
    I know what you mean though. You need that girl companionship sometimes. I get that with my sister and my best friend though.
    I can do without girl friends in my life. LOL

    I don’t do much shopping and pampering anyway… and when I do, the hubby likes to come along. 🙂

    Hope your halloween was great.

  • 23. Shanni  |  November 2nd, 2005 at 12:42 pm

    *ahem* I live not too far away and work right near Paseo Colorado twice a week but never have anyone to shop with. We must have similar tastes (I love your shoes and we drive the exact same car). I moved here for a man and don’t have many female friends in Cali so I’m more than happy to meet up with you for some shopping and girl talk! :mrgreen:

  • 24. Atomic Bombshell » &hellip  |  November 6th, 2005 at 9:49 pm

    […] In my recent quest to find some friends of the female variety, I’ve been thinking back to the days when I actually had some… Trying to discover and analyze common elements, hoping to glean some useful insight that might help me today. […]

  • 25. Jennifer  |  November 7th, 2005 at 7:30 am

    I feel your pain. All my long time girlfriends are married with children. They don’t have time to shop, have lunch, go out for coffee. I was griping about this earlier to a guy friend of mine. In my area, I have no geeky friends and really no girl friends. We should all move to the same town and shop and irc together 🙂

  • 26. Suki  |  November 9th, 2005 at 2:41 pm

    Yeah, I have that secret wish to make some girlfriends… :/

  • 27. Atomic Bombshell » &hellip  |  November 16th, 2005 at 11:53 pm

    […] Then, as if the day wasn’t already fubar, I had the extreme honor of being verbally assaulted by a deranged freak, which took the wind right out of my sails when it comes to that whole wanting friends of the female variety idea. […]

  • 28. Atomic Bombshell » &hellip  |  November 17th, 2005 at 6:49 am

    […] Then, as if the day wasn’t already fubar, I had the extreme honor of being verbally assaulted by a deranged freakette, which took the wind right out of my sails when it comes to that whole wanting friends of the female variety idea. […]

  • 29. QueenBitch  |  November 21st, 2005 at 10:51 am

    Nice blog (I’m SO jealous).

    I used to have an issue with other women too… It took forever to find the right girlfriends. A couple of my best girlfriends became that after we had known each other for years, and all finally grew up.

    Never have been the type to want to go shopping with the girls or to join a group for women only… But after finally just telling the competitive ones to go screw themselves, I found my dream girls.

    Good luck! 😀

  • 30. Rakesh Panicker  |  January 2nd, 2006 at 3:13 am

    I want good nature girl friends.
    Which is changing my ideas.

  • 31. Andrea  |  January 10th, 2006 at 1:35 pm

    I agree… I used to have a best friend who was a girl, but I don’t know what happened, she stopped talking to me. I don’t have many close girl friends. Mainly guy friends… At timesI do like it better that way, but at the same time I feel like I should have a close female friend… I just can’t deal with jealousy.

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